The doctor says I gots a strep froat and my allergies are going crazy because of stress and mother nature. He gave me a z-pack, an inhaler, and said I needed to rest for the next few days. No workouts, he says. Take a break, snuggle my baby (he’s also sick), and drink lots of water. My body needs recovery. Last week, I worked 50 hours, edited 1/5th of my next novel, officiated two weddings, was the best man in one of them, and still had the energy to be a good influence in my family of six. By Friday, I was coughing. By Sunday, I had cold sweats. By Tuesday, I was begging to leave work early because I couldn’t breath. Apparently, burning the candle on both ends is bad for your health… I know, right?
Spoiler alert… I don’t rest well. Even a lazy Saturday afternoon features at least a few loads of laundry. My anxiety prevents me from finding comfort in emptiness.
It’s quite the conundrum. I feel trapped. Darned if I do, darned if I don’t. And you know what else? Conundrum is a really weird word. Say it out loud. Feels funny, don’t it? The actual sound of the word is in line with its definition. It feels like an awkward avalanche in my mouth.
So yeah, I’m not going to workout this week. It was a hard decision, but it’s the right move. For Me. I asked my brother what he thought, and he said I should eat more real food and rest. I think he has his text messages set to auto-reply for anytime I ask him fitness-related questions. I asked Google, which is a more friendly version of my brother, and it gave me 200 opinions. There’s no right answer. Seriously, Google “Should I workout when sick?” and read through the descriptions. If anything, it made the decision even harder.
Frankly, the only reason I would even consider working out is for the Death To Dadbod post. But what does that make me? How can I claim #NoFilterFitness but also damage myself for the sake of attention? Might as well put dog ears on me.
I’m not going to tell you what to do. If you’re sick and need a break, heal up. Get better. Take a nap. Rest. Recover. A few days off will not ruin you. #Beastmode ain’t that cool when you choke on your own boogies.
At the same time, if you can’t function without exercise, then get one in! Have at it. I’m not a doctor, I don’t even play one on TV, so what do I know? Do you, boo boo.
What I’ve experienced this week:
- I had a dream that my cat, Ghost, and I were able to build machines using only our minds. We were building objects to clean our house without even so much as a piece of metal. It was awesome. The only caveat, Ghost’s imagination kept undoing all my work.
- My baby has an upper respiratory virus. Which, just like every other ailment, means he cries a lot. Other than that, not much else to note. He peed on me before bath-time though, that was fun.
- My oldest son has been happy to take a week off from working out. He’s said his legs were sore, and he needed to rest up. Fortnite is a great recovery tool, apparently.
- My daughters are afraid when I’m sick. They hover over me and watch me, as if they’re waiting for my heart to give out. It’s sweet, and also really awkward.
- Ghost purred on my for 90 minutes during one nap. As soon as I got up, my nose started running like the River Nile. I’m not saying he’s like a plush z-pack, but hit me up if you want to pay for his services.
- My wife is awesome. She’s been forced to do all the work while I’ve become useless. She’s stayed patient, despite me definitely having the man flu and our baby acting like he’s trying to break the world record for least amount of sleep. Thank you, Rib.
- I can’t wait to workout next week.
Tune in next week for another Dead to Dadbod.
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